It’s been years since I’ve written, and I honestly never thought I would again…
I didn’t have anything else to say. I spilled out all my pain and emotion and found there was nothing left but bitterness, hatred, disgust and on good days, indifference. Over the years, I took my tumultuous thoughts and sculpted them as best as I could to be ammunition for constructive progression… So I wanted to share my successes with the platform I’ve exposed myself most to; You.
I graduated from Colorado State University with a Bachelors of Science in Zoology and Conservation Biology, and leading up to it I had accomplished so many of my life goals. I helped with research in two biology labs and had the opportunity to work alongside research professionals who were changing the world in climate change and pharmaceuticals. I worked on three personal major climate change mitigation proposals, one of which opened a door for me to do research in Alaska — of which I leave for in 3 days for training in Seattle, WA. I accomplished my all time dream of visiting the awe inspiring South Africa. I drank, ate, danced and sang with villagers, learned some phrases, and better yet began understanding the problems they face on such a realistic level. It’s imprinted on my soul in a way few places have or ever will. I’ve been traveling all though college and had amazing experiences with people I love(d) and I wouldn’t change that for anything. And Anaya, my almost three year old pooch, has been by my side through all of the good and bad. She’s truly a blessing I never thought I’d have the privilege to have…
Through all the pain of the past, I made something of myself. I went against the current/grain/flow of everyday structured life and succeeded despite the odds stacked against me… Being told I wasn’t smart enough or cut out for my major, my sexual assault, my friend’s suicide, my father’s attempted suicide, and the loss of my sister and friend all still mourning the loss of the love of my life in addition to my loss of faith… I never thought I’d make it out alive let alone accomplish what I have thus far.
I look forward to what the future holds for me. As of right now, I want a family of my own. Who knows where and when, but that’s been at my core for a while now. So we’ll see where that goes. There’s no rush, because if the man I love finds love and peace with someone else, well… Then I’ll just adopt someone who needs a mommy and start my own all by myself. 🙂 Hell, I’ve done everything else in an unusual way, why would raising my child be any different?
wildsunfox 